Following in the well-trod footsteps of such similar so-called “comedies” like CBS’ Two and a Half Men and 2 Broke Girls, NBC’s Undateable proves that, to the allegedly “creative” show writers and producers in Hollywood, there is absolutely no humor to be found on anything else on Earth other than sex, sex, and more sex.
Here are a few “highlights” from the Thursday, June 29th (9:00 p.m. ET) episode:
Justin greets his girlfriend Nicki after she returns from a trip.
Nicki: “I just want to throw you over my shoulder and carry you into that bedroom, throw a pair of extra socks on those icicle toes of yours, and just get crazy.”
Justin: “Holy moly. The way you said that was so sexy, I think I just finished.”
Justin discusses Nicki’s sexual performance with his friends.
Justin: “Let’s say, uh, this guy and his girlfriend have sex, and his girlfriend does some amazing things that she’s never, ever done before. It was a little scary.”
Danny: “Good scary or bad scary?”
Justin: “It was terrifying.”
Shelly: “Uh oh, somebody’s thumb went somewhere.”
Justin: “You don’t know what it’s like in there. I mean she’s putting moves on top of moves. Now she’s flipping around the bedroom. It’s like a damn Cirque Du Soleil show in there.”
Danny claims he taught Justin his sexual technique.
Danny: “But, like, it’s my move that I told him about, so in a lot of ways, last night I was Justin’s penis.”
Brett: “Yeah, I’ve had dreams about being another man’s penis. And I always wake up just before they put on the condom, ’cause it feels like I’m being suffocated.”
Lesly: “Hey, sweetie. We should celebrate like obnoxious dudes before these idiots do it first. [in deep voice] Yo, girl! You tap that fine piece?”
Nicki: [in deep voice] “Aw, hell, yeah. I crushed that ass.”
Shelly: “Unless you’re talking about Courtney Love. That bitch ruins things.”
Is this REALLY the kind of dialogue that belongs on the airwaves owned by the American people – coming into living rooms as early at 8:00 p.m. Central/Mountain, and rated by NBC as acceptable for 14 year olds?
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